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My husband and I were open from the start (5 years before 1 year of marriage) but have had more Ages-Brookside friends-with-benefits than term relationships. We had one month triad with a woman but they make better friends than lovers. I once fell in with another, but our timing was off, and he's now in a monogamous relationship with my sister-in-law (she knows and asked for my "blessing" before they dated). Just recently, we had an amazing threesome with a dear friend. While we are happy to accept whatever come of that, we don't expect anything more than the friendship to continue. That: being able to accept without expecting, is very important. Most important, of course, is having strong communication and conflict resolution skills. Though that is important in every relationship, it's especially true of open relationships. That's simultaneously so heteronormative and incoherent that I don't know whether or not to ask you to put the pipe down, or just walk away shaking my head. I think instead I shall note that the objections, every time, in every state, and even in the language of DOMA, to same sex marriage are founded on religion, despite the Fourteenth Amendment to the Constitution: "Section 1. All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the state wherein they reside. No state shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any state deprive any person of life, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws." I think that much says it all. The most coherent and balanced discussion I've seen about same-sex marriage is here:Sweet wives want hot sex Paia
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